The all-important Back Cover!

While Evan is slaving away on the graphic for the back cover of Ferris’ Bluff for the actual book, it’s becoming critical that I decide on what to have printed there.  Sure, it would be easy to work up a witty blurb enticing readers to check the book out, but what I really need are some quotes—you know—some of those witty snippets you see on all the popular books.

But since I don’t know any of those famous people or have much of a track record, I guess I’ll just have to make some up. Hell, most of them sound made up anyway.

“Ferris’ Bluff—a better thriller than I ever wrote”— Michael Connerly—bestselling author

“Ferris’ Bluff is a damn fine thriller, even if it isn’t set in Florida and doesn’t have a single fish in it”—Randy Wayne Whight—author of lots of books

“I could pronounce every name in that book! Good job, Mr. Limberg, and welcome to the club”—John Lescroart, award winning author

“Ferris’ Bluff, a thriller that will keep you on the edge of your seat, unless you’re reading in bed. Then, not so much” Woodly Allen, author, filmmaker and clarinetist

“I really liked Fer…Fersh…Fairest…$#!t. I really liked Fershist Buff…Ferliss…Fersh…f^#&! Read Fershish Bu…Blush…$#!T!  What the bleedin’ f*%k! SHARON???”—Ozzy Ozbourne— Rock God

“At first I thought the f&%#er had ripped off my main character, the capable loner with a sense of duty, but no…he invented his own, and it’s a damn good one”—Lee Childs—thriller writer extraordinaire

“Great story, great characters, villainous villains, and even a neat romantic arc, but dude…you definitely need more guns in a story like this. Granted the Hi-Power and the PSG-1 are both really cool guns, but you need more guns”—Steven Hunter, bestselling author and respected movie critic

“Ferris’ Bluff is the kind of book that you can’t put down, like a lot of mine are” John Stanford—bestselling author

“Stunningly brilliant! Brilliantly Stunning! A tour de force! Riveting! Smashing! A debut worthy of Broadway and the red carpet! Absolutely Smashingly Brilliant and Stunning!”—Book Blurb Generator—used by dozens of real authors who haven’t got time to actually read the frigging book

“If you buy one book this summer, buy mine—but if you buy two, buy Ferris’ Bluff after you’ve bought mine”—Tom Glancy, the king of techno-thrillers and really long novels

“Layered well thought-out plot, characters that come to life as soon as you meet them, and an ending that leaves your ears ringing…Ferris’ Bluff has it all” Diane Grobenstein (one of James Paterson’s hundreds of co-authors and soon to be on the best seller lists)

Hope you got a chuckle out of this. I did. That’s kind of sad and telling isn’t it…

Please feel free to add your own back cover blurbs in the comments section—I mean, c’mon, a guy can’t have too many brilliantly smashing reviews, can he?